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When you don't know what you're talking about, it's hard to know when you're finished...

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

What Would YOU Have Said?



Remember back in 2004 when the Deputy was caught peeing in a public elevator? This shit really does happen!



I work in a downtown building, which is frequented by the public... and the occasional street person. A few months ago, an employee got onto an elevator, to discover that the person riding with him had apparently just pissed on the floor of the elevator.
He was so astonished, he said nothing to the guy...


After all, it wasn't like it was in a neat little package even...


Just all over the side and the floor....

...nor was it because he thought it would be a warm and fuzzy


feeling regarding his trip there that day...


Noooooo, it was more of a huge fuck you to those he was leaving behind there that day. Turns out it was a very unhappy client. Guess he didn't get everything he wanted in his divorce. There are no cams in these elevators, so he got away with it.

Anyway, the guy who was in the elevator with him that day has been teased endlessly about what he should have said or done at the time. He is retiring next month and the coordinators of the party are gathering suggestions of what he could or should have said or done that day to further give him asses and elbows.

So far, the contributions are few:

* Did I somehow piss you off?
* Excuse me, you seem to be leaking...
* How do YOU spell relief...
* Is it raining in here or are you just happy to see me?
* Was it good for you?
* Listen, Mr. I. P. Freely, I don't know where you come from, but we don't do that here.
* Better to be pissed off than pissed on...

What would YOU have said or done?

7 comments:

Phillipia said...

Aw shit...no wait...that's not what I meant...

Tim Higgins said...

WT,

Having experienced a divorce (or two before) the response seems obvious.

"Hey man, if that's all she left you, I'd go ahead and take it with."

Marissa said...

"Um, sir, you missed a spot."

BTW - LOL "I.P. Freely"! I still say that as often as I can. :D

Anonymous said...

Remember, outside you're American, in the elevator European!

moooooog35 said...

My options:

"Oh, thank God you can do that here, because I really have to take a shit."

"Huh. I always thought the 'P' button was for 'Parking Garage.'"

"The one day I don't take the stairs..."

"SWORDFIGHT!!"

Shawn said...

I already showered, but thanks.

Winky Twinky said...

Phillipia: uhh-huhh...

TH: hehe, good advice.

Marissa: Yeah, it's a classic

Anonymous: Ahh, is that how it works...

Moooooog: Good ones... LMAO @ SWORDFIGHT!!

Shawn: Can you really take too many showers?